Being left alone (for the time being)

Coming to visit my parents is always something I need to think twice about...I never know when they are going to start the "you need to find a man and settle down" stuff. It seems like after July 6 (the day I got my first paycheck) my dad just went bonkers. He acts SO desparate...it's almost as if HE wants to get married again! I would tolerate him telling people that I'm looking and what not but he just doesn't say that...if he hears of someone getting married, he'll say to my mom "oh when is my daughter going to see some happiness. Why doesn't god shine his mercy on us." (no kidding..my DAD says this...normally it's the moms that are this melodramatic) I've heard him talk to his friends about this topic and if someone didn't know what the topic was and overheard just a part of the conversation, it would sound like I am dying or in desparate need of a life saving operation or a transplant or something! Oh the humiliation...and to make matters worse, all the other aunties and uncles don't see anything wrong with his behavior!

To add insult to injury, even though I've been open minded and told my parents fine u can introduce me to people but I want to talk via email to the person first...they seem to be living in the 60s. My mom thinks it's wrong (her words not mine!) "wrong!" to email him first b/c what's the point of talking if there is no potential. I'm like, some months I work 100 hours a week and you want me to drive down from Hamilton and meet not only some random guy, but his parents, his siblings, his siblings spouses, the spouses' parents, the aunts, uncles and uncles kids friends and what not before I even talk to this guy (ok so I'm exagerating a bit but not by much)! I'm like I am NOT bringing out chai on a tray...if he wants chai he bloody well go make it himself and make me a cup as well!

So here I am arguing with her trying to point out that at least via email I can screen and she thinks it's better to screen in person. The alternative she proposes is that I talk to him on the phone first and then meet and then email! I'm like what the f#@#@. So in my 100 hour work week, with the time left over (which by the way is only 68 hours left...and if I sleep let's say 6 hours a night for 5 nights (will be working the other two nights)...that leave me with 38 hours in a week during which I have to read (which I never do), cook, clean, shower, catch up on emails, attend meetings once or twice a month, socialize with my co workers a couple of times a month AND come down to TO at least once a month to see my parents...and I haven't even touched on talking to MY friends on the phone much less seeing them) ...with this precious time left over u want me to talk to some random guy that I know nothing about...and not only talk to him to make small talk but talk to him to see if he's marriage potential! And within a week or two of the introduction the parents ask "so what do u think" (ie is he marriage potential..should we talk to his parents about moving things forward)

Now am I the only one who sees some serious things wrong with this!!! I finally had to get my cousin's wife involved (us brown folks and our bloody extended families) who finally after an hour saw my point of view and convinced my mom that emailing first was a good thing...my mom thought it would look rude to the guy'z family (mind u, there is no actual guy in the picture...this is all in case they actually find a guy to introduce me to)....I'm like it's the bloody 20th century. I'm sure he'd appreciate not wasting his time either! Besides what do u think ppl do via email?

Lucky for me this time, they didn't bother me with this topic. But I doubt I'll be so lucky next time. Besides, I've already been deemed too picky b/c I said no to two guyz...one of whom was super nice but lived in the states and STILL had the fob hair and the striped golf shirt (primary colors of course), TUCKED IN with high wasted pants, after living there for 15 years (dude if you can't conform just a little in that time...I'm sorry...I'll be way to westernized for u!) He was a nice guy but nice guy on its own doesn't cut it...besides I don't want to move to the US (unless of course Orlando Bloom marries me and wants me to move there!). The other guy was Canadian born...went to med school in Pakistan. His mother called like a gazillion times until I finally said fine give him my email address so she'd leave my mom alone for a bit. He'd been back for 1.5 years? 0.5 year? 2.5 years? (his mom, him and my friend who knows him all gave me different answers). HIs mom wanted him to marry a doctor so she could help him study...HE'S THIRTY YEARS OLD! If he doesn't have the ambition and drive to study on his own to do his exams, I bloody ain't gonna hold his hand and push him to do it! When I asked him, so what will you do if you don't get a residency position here? His answer (well he didn't actually answer the question), was how foreign trained docs are discriminated against and how they are just as good as canadian trained docs blah blah... so he had no idea (or didn't want to share) what he would do if he didn't get in here...now don't you think I need to know if this guy is planning on nmving to like siberia or something if he doesn't get to practice here??? My mom, by the way, thought this was also an inappropriate question...so he can ask me anything he bloody well wants, but I can't ask him his future goals.

Sigh...so I'm picky b/c I said no to two guyz and I have too many criteria (which by the way are as follows. For me to be introduced to a guy, I require that he be: 1) Educated 2) Westernized (ie born here or been here for a long time). I'll talk to him and then go from there. So as you can see, my life of criteria is WAY too long! (sarcasm by the way should be very apparent)

Anyhow, I hadn't written in a while so I thought I'd rant. This topic is the biggest thing for me to rant about these days b/c I am reminded of it on an almost daily basis. My answer to aunties now who ask me "when are you getting married" is: "next week. I found this really hot black guy and we are going to Jamaica to get married. Would you be able to come? It'll be on the beach so please dress appropriately" (all said of course with a huge smile!)