Posted elsewhere but needed to be repeated
Mid 20s....dont' know what I thought my life would be like when I reached my mid 20s but certainly didn't imagine that it would be the way it is. While some part of me wanted these things, I'm not sure I actually ever seriously thought they would happen...always put it down to a naive child's dreams/wishes.
Now here I am...in my mid 20s...doing what it is that I wanted to do, an independent Muslim woman...have experienced living on my own, starting to see the world, having opportunities that I am blessed to have and capatilize on.
Yet...despite all this, it doesn't feel complete. Something is missing. While I am eternally grateful to Allah for providing me with the chance to do what I want and be passionate about it...is it enough? Makes me think: Are we as human beings ever satisfied or do we always want what we don't have....I for one will be honest and say that while I am satisfied with one aspect of my life, I am not satisfied with others. And since I am a person who is very pro-active in her life to make things happen, it is quite frustrating when I can't do anything about it!
I didn't realize how much I have given up to be where I am today until very recently...people always told me you and your family have made such sacrifices and yet it never felt that way to me...things were they way they were b/c that's how they had to be...pure and simple...but it's not that simple. I always saw others who made different choices from me as people who had let their dreams and goals go. However, now I think that perhaps it was simply that their goals/priorities changed...whereas mine stayed where they were. could be b/c I can be stubborn and only learn the hard way but doing thigns myself rather than learning from others who have gone through things already.
Would I have done anything differently, knowing what I know now, feeling what I feel now...most likely not...do I think I made a mistake...certainly not...and yet...it doesn't feel 100% satisfying like I thought it would. Perhaps I should have done things a bit differently and taken another route of life to get to where I am today...but had different opportunities presented themselves, I wonder if I would have taken them...or would I have pushed them aside....I guess I'll never know.
Now here I am...in my mid 20s...doing what it is that I wanted to do, an independent Muslim woman...have experienced living on my own, starting to see the world, having opportunities that I am blessed to have and capatilize on.
Yet...despite all this, it doesn't feel complete. Something is missing. While I am eternally grateful to Allah for providing me with the chance to do what I want and be passionate about it...is it enough? Makes me think: Are we as human beings ever satisfied or do we always want what we don't have....I for one will be honest and say that while I am satisfied with one aspect of my life, I am not satisfied with others. And since I am a person who is very pro-active in her life to make things happen, it is quite frustrating when I can't do anything about it!
I didn't realize how much I have given up to be where I am today until very recently...people always told me you and your family have made such sacrifices and yet it never felt that way to me...things were they way they were b/c that's how they had to be...pure and simple...but it's not that simple. I always saw others who made different choices from me as people who had let their dreams and goals go. However, now I think that perhaps it was simply that their goals/priorities changed...whereas mine stayed where they were. could be b/c I can be stubborn and only learn the hard way but doing thigns myself rather than learning from others who have gone through things already.
Would I have done anything differently, knowing what I know now, feeling what I feel now...most likely not...do I think I made a mistake...certainly not...and yet...it doesn't feel 100% satisfying like I thought it would. Perhaps I should have done things a bit differently and taken another route of life to get to where I am today...but had different opportunities presented themselves, I wonder if I would have taken them...or would I have pushed them aside....I guess I'll never know.
posted by Anokhi at
4:30 PM
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